Empty

The best event of the year is about to fade away. With a blink of an eye, I was back to my home and came back to this place that I still feel a little bit unacquainted. Especially when you just dragged you self from your home sweet home to a place where silly stuffs always happen. 


Right before my long long~ train journey back to my hometown, I had a good time hanging out with Poh, Bing and Pooi. Went to Serdang Jusco for one movie and six hours of k-singing, and then, the next day two more movie we ran to. haha... it was freaking fun, I like it this way, the fun stuffs that come in rallies. After the two movie Me Poh and Bing hanged out at Kajang McD right before the train ride and had some good time chatting, haha, free wifi... woohoo. After reaching Pasir mas, I dropped by my grandpa house 1st, I ought to, you know, respect for the elder. Then just I can go to my home and meet my parents and definitely my long missed dog Vicky! After a good long lick from her, I gave her a bath, just like the way she loved to. Then~ Fuh, finally my time to rest... the whole ride back didn't have a good sleep. >.<


That night was 除夕, had a big dinner with the relatives. And the next day, 初一, this is where the joy begins, where the ang paos started running to me... haha. Had many relatives visited my humble abode. And that night, we all had steamboat, my stomach was full like hell. There was more than 15 of us but the food is still not finished...haha. The next day, 初二, it's our turn to visit other relatives place. That night, we had a barbecue pulak. This was my idea. So, I had to do most of the work, buy all the ingredient and clean up the mess... hah, whole lot of work but totally worth it.

 -=Steamboat=-

 -=Old Friends=-

After the bbq, I rushed to town to meet some of my good friends, long-time-no-see friends. We hang out at a coffee shop. LOL, every single person that met me during CNY said that I look different already. It kinda bumps me out cuz the same thing gets to you over and over again? come on man, I realized that I'm changed lar, but give me a break. >.< 
Chinese New Year, the big time of the year, of course all people love that, the new stuffs, the ang paos, the gathering... But there are some part that I'm not fond with. Like dealing with your relatives... dun wan to say much but, you know la, when you stay with your long seperated relative sure there will be some conflicts...


And back to this campus, it gave me the empty feeling again. I my self dun even know what's the cause of it. I mean I did alot of fun stuffs everyday here, hanging out with friends here but I still feel like I'm leaving a meaningless life in these fully occupied days. And at last, there's still a big emptiness that still not filled that is dangling in my heart... 

“我很想你。我想念那可爱贪玩，但又成熟乐观懂得关心人的你。但可恨的是距离和时机。这没有结局的故事后所带来的空虚，到现在都还没人来填满。。。”

Feelings

One of my friends just post a meaningful blog post, and kinda suit want I'm thinking about now...or maybe slightly...

"Feelings is such a fragile thing; with a slightest shake, it can resonate your actions.

But sometimes, people just don't realize the existence of such fragility and ends up hurting others more than they intentionally plan to.

Feelings are hard to understand, minds are hard to read.

But if fate let us meet and bonds tie us connected to each other, why can't we all take that extra mile to widen up our horizons?

Open up our boundaries, look outside the window and ponder - how far are you willing to go and withstand difficulties with people who mean a world to you?

Yes, people get into your nerves. People upset you. When that happens, you'll start feeling as if the whole world against you and nothing just seems to go well for you.

But hey, isn't that what life is all about? Nothing goes the way you want it to be. And that's the challenge we have to undertake.

The choice of paths are already laid out in front of us. All we have to do is to choose one which suits us best. There's no right or wrong in this case, but it's how we decide to live our lives to the fullest. That's what which decides who we currently are and who we want to be.

It's never too late to switch paths midway. Everyone deserves a second chance. But the question here is, are you willing to go through all the trouble of turning back?

Some people keep personal matters to themselves.

I wouldn't care less if they mean nothing to me.

But if it involves me in the scenario, don't just shut yourself up in the corner and start exploding one day. In the long run, you're the one who's gonna suffer the most.

What's wrong with opening up and sharing your thoughts? Tell me what you truly feel. Nobody's perfect - so are you, so am I.

Ignorance is bliss, yes.

But ignorance is cruel as well.

How would you feel if you were to put yourself in the shoes of the party being ignored?

Go figure."

Metaphorical speaking: "Maybe it's time for me to get down,

from this train ride... at least, just for awhile"

All this time I'd been wearing a smile for you all.

Let me BE what I'm feeling right now...

At least, just for a while...

The Bro Code

Hmm... Time sure flies, in a flash time sem2 is here. Ever since after the sem1 final, ppuhh~ there's been so many outing that I now get confused which one I went with who and to where...XD... CNY is coming soon!! haha... these few outing are mainly to hunt down new clothes for CNY~ LOL... these all have to thanks my mom for bank in some extra money for that... "Thanks mom! You're the best! hehe". I'd got my new shoe, new socks, new shirt...LOL, and finally new haircut... Talking about the haircut, fuh~ took me 25 bucks to bring myself to a whole new level ^^. Elton said I look like L! Shhhuushh! I dun wanna look like L..=.= but I get alots of compliments la...thnx guys ^^...

-= New haircut x) =-

Passed weeks I've been to few places like Kajang( *sigh, kajang again...XD), Time Square, Sungei Wang, SunWay, Pavillion, Midvalley, Cheras Night Market, and today KLCC. Luckily get my new clothes at these places ^^. I spent alot of time with my friends, and actually getting closer to each other, all engineerings and biosciences.. =) And for the first time, went to the Cheras famous pasar malam with the gang together with Shannon, Poipoi and Samantha. LOL, my uni life pop out afew new characters again...hehe... We all had fun in Cheras. The food there, fuhyoo~ alot! Outings like these sure make you tired, but it's rewarding and FUN!! Let the photos tell the story.. ^^

  -= Cheras =-

 -= McD =-

 -= Kajang. Roar! =-

 -= Pavillion =-

 -= TimeSquare =-

-= McD again! =-

 -= Heading to KLCC =-

 -= KLCC =-

Since we've been living together for more than 2 SEMs, alot of things had happen among us. All those conflicts, fun time, bummers among us or what-so-ever.... are actually mean that we all are much more closer to each other than before, we all close enough that we understand and see each other on both good and bad sides. Haizz, many stuffs had happen around us, alot of conflicts I can say, stuffs that maybe someday we'll think back and have a smirk at it. But, friends and bros.... haizzz, sometime there's somepart of you that I hate, it's just that I dun wan to show my feeling and that's why we're still brothers... that's why we're still friends. Ain't that what Bros and friends are about after all? To still be by your side after knowing the real you and seeing the bad side of yours...

Ten Promises

Days after I brought Vicky home, my cousin "Fedex"-ed me this DVD, thnx for that again. It was great. A great Japanese movie indeed. =)
Recently I watched this Japanese movie again. For the second time, it still touched me, it should touched all the dogs' owners out there. Here are those Ten Promises. Don't own one if you can't manage these 10 things...haha...

1.Give me time to understand what you want of me.
2.Place your trust in me. It’s crucial to my well being.
3.Be aware that however you treat me. I will never forget it.
4.Before you scold me for being lazy, ask yourself if something might be bothering me.
5.Talk to me sometimes. Even if i don’t understand your words, I do understand your voice when it’s speaking to me.
6.Remember before you hit me, I have a teeth that could hurt you, but that I choose not to bite you.
7.Take care of me when I get old.
8.My life likely to last 10 to 15 years. Any separation from you will be painful for me.
9.You have your work, your entertainment, and your friends. I have… only you.
10.Go with me on difficult journeys. Everything is easier for me if you are there. Remember I love you…

Thank you for being by my side.
Since I own my dog, my life changed. I've learned a lot of stuffs and I learned that sometimes dogs do come better than human... Thanks for being a part of my life...^^

End of Rainbows Year

*long sigh*~ The year 2009 finally come to an end and on this 1st Jan. of 2010, I can say many of big memorable things had happened in 2009, those that made me feel great-full, those that made me cry and those that change my way of thinking. Today I'd just arrived at campus after one week of holidays back to my hometown. After nearly half a year spending hundreds of kilometers apart from home, I've finally met my family and my beloved dog. First, when I'd arrived my mother's workplace, with the eager feeling that I've never had, I called out "ma". haha, my mom was like blurred for a sec. She can't recognize me on the first sight hahaha. She said I look like a girl...sad T.T Once I get back home, I received a most welcoming wet kiss from Vicky, haha... I missed her so much. She's like a daughter to me and I know that she won't forget this owner after months. =)

-=汤圆=-

Back to my hometown, I went Kelantanese so bad until I ate one "bungkus" of nasi lemak with me bare hand and with me one leg on the chair...haha...Ahh~ home sweet home. Some of the things may have change, whether is of me that change or my hometown that change, the feeling for me to Kelantan is still the same. I manage to eat my grandfather's 汤圆. And I get to give Vicky a bath on Friday. I also met my friends and had a barbecue on the last night before I left. I had the most fun during the barbecue, they know that I'm going on the 31st, they change it to 30th night last minute because of me, huhu so touched. T.T

-=Barbecue Time!=-

The reason I said I'm tired in this passed 2009 maybe because I missed my home bad and alot of things had happen this year.

At the beginning to of the year, I was taking my license and being at home all the time. You know lar, after SPM mar... Plus knowing that NS was waiting for me on March, so I must get my license before that. Finally get my car and motor license. =)

-=Driving License=-

Then February, CNY was here, and right after 8 days of the new year, I got my 1st dog, a milky brown fluffy golden retriever I named Vicky. Thanks to my aunt who was so supportive in buying my long dreamed pet. But unfortunately, my grandma was sick and can't stand any longer with her life depends on a machine. When they decided to put grandma's life to an end by shutting off the machine, We were all went back to Kuantan to see grandma for the last time. One by one all of us went beside grandma saying the last goodbye, with the pipe poking down her throat, I can't help out to cry, my hands were shivering and I wished that she won't leave us.... It was to much for me, plus the arguments among the family members, I was speechless. I miss you grandma...

-=Vicky=-

March, I went to NS at Kem Desa Rimba, Kuala Kangsar. NS, the high point of my life, fill my life with sweet memories and some regrets. I met bunch of good friends there, I get my chance to perform on stage of my juggling and beatbox skill =P. And most unforgettable, I get my 1st relationship there. And I regret to not making things clear early and time was not being on my side that time, I din get much time with her, I miss her so much, but now I'm weak enough to let go... I miss you CF... I'm sorry...  Sorry that I din't keep my promise... Long distance relationship is not as I thought, if I was there enough for you, things could have been better....

 -=NS shirt=-

I was in Ns till 9th of June. I remember I came out early to get into form 6 on the 11th. haha.. funny thing, I change my mind after few days in form 6. I went to search for colleges in KL and finally ended up in Nottingham, the Uni that I like at the 1st visit.

July till now, spending my Uni in Nottingham, chosen foundation in engineering, which diff. from what I dream of, but the grateful thing is I met alot of nice friends here, and I like every single one of them. But of course, leaving together, meeting each other day and night, conflicts and fun stuffs sure happen now and then. I'm still happy to know all of my friends.

-=UNMC=-

By the time wriitting this post, my mood of writting just flown away...haha sorry, I am thinking of the things that once were big things of my life and still are that I can't forget...I've been through alot this year, born death, my every other 1st things... In the end of 2009, life can be full of happiness and can be full of regrets. But what's the fun of a flawless life? Life can be always different from what you wanted, life can be different just because of a chance that you let slip trough. I could have turn another corner, I could have taken another road... but life's just full of regrets, and I guess that my destiny that brings me to where and who I am now.... haizzz.. funny thing, why do human always tends to remember all the sad stuffs instead of the happy stuffs? Why does the sad memories always come stronger than the happy ones?... I hope this year, 2010, will be better...

In the end, I dedicate this song for all the people I met, I knew and I loved... "So Close" by Jon Mclaughlin

Next Stop : HOME

Haizz...tonight, the atmosphere in the campus is very silent and chilly. All foundations went back home dy, near from Semenyih; far from Sabah, all went home ady... Tonight left me and Wei only in campus, luckily Bing gave him his keys, I came here for tonight, if not, fuh! Kapas hall there die also no people know arh~ haha XD... Today just came back from Klang, once we're back, the whole campus was like ours, barely you can see a person walking. After Bing and Fei fei went back le, me and Wei nothing to do le, since our train is on tomorrow, we can just enjoys the campus like ours abit lo, we went to conquer the punching bag first, haha...then the gym room and swimming pool....

-=Punching bag=-

This passed week, since it was the last week before the holidays, fuh~ nearly everyday went out to have fun... On Monday, after the exam, Ida, Xiao han, Joanne and me went to Kajang on 1.30. We went there to prepare the birthday gift for KY. First we went to search for the photo frame cube and play around in a gift shops, haha, so many funny stuffs inside. After that we went to print 6 photos of pure friendship for the cube..haha. then we went to McD to decorate the thing. Another thing is, wah~ I discover a cool thing in Kajang, LG Crystal... Ish, Santa, I want a LG Crystal~~ haha XD

-=LG Crystal=-

On Thursday pulak, I went to Kajang again with my bunch of engineering friends for bowling. Then, something that I most proud of and kinda surprised me happened. haha... When we got our lane, I was thinking, haizzz, all of them are not common player nih~ Arrhh, play only lar, low score tak ape. Wah! who knows, I got a strike for my first shot. wohoo~ then I thought, that's the lucky strike for today, but then, hehe, I ate Turkey! wahaha... so happy and surprised at the same time, three strikes in a row and 5 strikes in a game! I got 160 score for the 1st game.... After bowling, we sit in Dunkin's Doughnut for snacks. hehe, I asked my mom for extra pocket money lerh that day, I said since these few days I am free so wanna play more lo thru sms... hahah, she said "dun play play arh! I give you extra 50 only.." haha, so funny... Then, when we went back to campus, we sat at the back of SA for dinner. I din't eat for that time, since I ate the burger in Kajang le, so just company they all eat only lor ^^... the SA keep playing all the Christmas songs, sooo got holiday feeling. Then, Cassey and the gang came to join us for dinner, we discuss for tomorrow midvalley plan pulak...haha.. KY was like, har?! go out where again orh... We went out too often le, KY also scare dy..XD

-=bowling=-

On Friday, I woke up early for the bus to KTM and to Midvalley. hahah, funny thing, we all are having moral test the nest day, we all like dun care much for it..haha XD. We all planned to watch movie that day, who knows, Fuh! the queue to the ticket counter, damn~~~ long. So we went to eat McD 1st lo, since we all hungry. While we were eating, you can hear the announcement to ticket sold out all the time... haizzz, our plan just drop away like that... We just walk around in midvalley the whole day, I had so much fun. Midvalley was damn crowded for the day. Before going back, we had Nando's for dinner.haha... Later that night, we all celebrate KY's 19th birthday in a simple way, but it was meaningfull lo... I think... hope KY appreciate it much... hahah...for the whole day, I din't really study for the test tomorrow... so bad...

-=Midvalley=-

Saturday, after the test, I prepare myself to go Klang Yyaw's house, with Poh, Bing Cassey, Feikean joining. Reached there about 4-5 and prepare for tonight's Yyaw's brother's farewell party. haha...my hair too messy le, Cassey and Feikean help me do my hair XD. Then, bring the limbo stands, we all went to Klang club for the night. First me met Yyaw's friends and had the dinner. The limbo dance thing is very funny, finally a small flexible kid won the thing...haha. Then, the dance floor was open, hahaha...we all were abit shy to dance infront... It was fun larh, but I lost my necklace on the dance floor while jump here and there...haizz.. T.T After the party, we went to Station 1 to yamcha and met Yyaw's friends again... Then, we went back and call it a day and I slept on a mattress and set alarm for early the next day...

Then today, after Bing, Poh, Cassey, Feikean and me reached Kajang, it was still early for our bus and for Cassey's train ride.  We went to “湾仔” for lunch... haha... we chat alot and I had alot of red bean... Ice blended red bean and red bean toast, haha =P. After accompany Cassey to KTM, we waited at the mamak stall for our bus and went back to campus...

Haizzz... for half a year, I havent went back to the all-missed "home sweet home" and meet my beloved parent. Finally, finally... I get a chance to finally go back home and take a "rest & pause" for many thing that happened. And I missed my Grandfather's cook... wanna see his smile again for 6 months ago... haizzz.. really, alot of things had happened in this year for me, and these are those that change my life and character... which I'll write on my next post..hehe... to be continue....

-=HOME=-

Shell of The Soul

Hhmmm... This week has been a crazy week and I had my own mind confused of my self...  Recently, hehe, due to free schedule, I had most of my time spending with my friends, It helps me to not THINK too much like when I'm alone. you know, you won't get to simply think when you get occupied... I get into basketball playing recently, kinda liked it already... That night, we even play bkb in the rain with my friends..haha, funny stuffs happened. Even when I'm free in the evening, i'll go up the field just simply to shoot the ball =)

-=Basketball=-

There's been alot of outing this passed week. We got the bowling playing trip to Kajang that day, with bunch of guys and three girls. After the bowling, we went for dinner at Old town.. Haizz mahal giler, a cup of Hazelnut White Coffee costs you 4.80 erh...

-=Old Town=-

And last Friday, I went to midvalley with my some of my friends again....hehe, we went to watch Ninja Assassin... Wah~ Rain..yeng!.. there's some of my friends who can't go that day coz they have the moral test running...so bad hor us, ppl having a test but we went out for a movie? =) That day, according to the plan, we're supposed to wake up early and go by the 8.30 bus...haha, who knows ended up going by the 10.30 bus...too early ady, prince Kok Yung said need more time to sleep..hehe.. After goin midvalley we all were tired, but still, we went to Tesco straight with the bus that sent us back to campus XD.. was soo tired that night... On the other hand, what's keep playing in my mind was how to get Cassey's Bday cake before Saturday night >.<.. but then, Matthew said, since he's goin to time square, he'll buy it instead.. Condition: No cheese, no berries, but chocolate for Cassey =)

-=Midvalley=-

Saturday night, we celebrate the birthday..haha.. We gave Cassey a big birthday surprise, everything went well...I guess. =) That night,we all had a freaking photo taking frenzy session... All crazy taking pictures...
The next day, I went to Time Square with they all again. Bunch of us, boys and girls, participated in the maxis road show's game. It was fun... The girls played the "Ping pong Sucking" game...haha, and we boys played the "Maxis Says" game...XD Then we went to Sungei Wang. I went to karaoke for the 1st time... I was superb..Enjoyed my self and Cassey had her second candle blowing again... After the whole day in KL, we were all tried...and tired I mean vveeerrryyy tired... I get cranky and tired, but weirdly combination of that make to get crazy XP...  I get affected by KY's gila-ness ady...cham >.< And the day after, I had to wake up early again, heading to Klang...fuh~ busy weekend..hehe

-=Maxis Roadshow=-

Came to Klang... Mmmm~ home cooked dinner....miss it so much...Sudden feeling of nostalgia came into mind again...weeks more!! yeah! can go back dy =) Today morning, had a classic Klang Bak Kut Teh breakfast...nice~

Now, hahaha, this is "How-I-Feel" part.... This passed week, my body kept doing things that kinda the opposite what my mind tell me to do...and there's always something in my mind that kept me confused. And after many things that I've gone through and think through...really...I feels old... old in the sense of thinking, matured thinking bah...Haarrgghh, really have to stop think think think le, should play play play!! I cant get to sleep well this few days, I even become like old people liao, sleep late but woke up early.. help me... What is wrong with me? haha...hope is not like a early menopause of mine in the age of 18 XD...